I should know about the after intense grief part too, but it often takes me by surprise. So, I will not be writing about going to cons today, although I hope to write about it soon.
After the emotional collapse of grief comes the physical collapse. Bryon had a truly intense cold during the week Mom was dying, which is rare for him. It’s not rare for me though, so I was hoping that I would not get it during all the crazy hospital/funeral stuff. And I didn’t, because I was running on pure adrenaline or something. On cue though, Thursday, the day after the funeral, bam! So I spent about a week with a really nasty head cold.
Strangely enough it went away quickly, in a matter of a few intense days. Bryon’s is still lingering, and we thought that was when fate had cut me a break. We had an excellent weekend and I was beginning to feel better.
Then on Monday…vertigo! I recognized what it was. I’ve never had it, but Bryon has with an ear infection. Unfortunately, vertigo is also associated with stroke. So, I got an ambulance ride to the local emergency room, where we ruled out heart disease and stroke. I suspect strongly it’s an ear infection. Also possibly it could be stress (ya think?) or it could be because I’m in my 50s, and this is one of the things that can happen in your 50s. 🙂
Anyway, two days with instances of vertigo. One day vertigo free. Lots of dizzy time and nausea time, but now I have meds! Yes! Science! And I will see my doctor on Monday to talk about my ears (which kind of hurt, so yes, I think ear infection). I need another vertigo free day before I am willing to drive myself anywhere, so we’ve been spending a lot of time at the day jobbe.
Good news. I’ve cleared out a few backlogged projects. Bad news. I haven’t been getting writing done. I just haven’t had it.
Right now I’m still being gentle with myself. If my body says rest, it will ultimately make sure I listen by pulling a stunt like this. But we’re gonna come back, and we’re gonna come back big!
Until then, well, we just keep treading water.