There I was, parked in front of my typewriter, notebook, and nook yesterday, plotting out the rest of the first Klarion book, which I am no longer certain of the name of, since the first one has split into two, thinking that I want to tell these stories, regardless of whether I can get the first one published or not.
Abigail Rath Versus Blood-Sucking Fiends was a break. It was once upon a time a very popular short story, and I wanted to see if I could write a book. Which I did, and I could write a few more books if it came down to it. But I am not, at this time, so motivated as to want to see the entire story if that book didn't sell as an anchor. I could spend the next several years writing Abby and her friends, but I don't have to.
This other story, though, I want to write it all. Truly if my focus is not about publishing, but is about telling the stories I have to tell in the best way I can tell them, I should do what I want.
So I will. And I will dutifully send them all out, making them all stand alone books in a series, but I will write them all nevertheless. For me. Because it's what I want. It is my artistic vision.
And yes, I will. Because I am the same person who took two years to make a Caterina Sforza suit for her master costumer status. Because I am the same person who took three years to write her dissertation. Because a thing worth doing is a thing worth doing. Because you do art for a lot of reasons.
You may look for me, then, to be the novelist in the background writing and writing and writing. I'm tired of pretending to be someone I'm not. Things get sort of knotted up sometimes, but in the end I guess I am the same person.
No more hand wringing about publishing and agents. More joy in the artistic effort in 3...2...1...