That is one heck of a presumptuous title. Maybe I'll start here, then.
We worry too much.
Yup. That feels better.
We worry too much. What I seem to be working on right now is worrying less. I didn't realize how much concern I had over certain silly things until I started to take a look at it.
Here's some examples that may sound familiar to you. Will I ever get this
You know, mostly paranoid, pathetic first world stuff. All of these questions are real concerns at some sort of level. It's very unlikely that I have heart trouble instead of heart burn, but you know, I think of Ferrett and how lucky he was to go to the doc when he did. I never waste any writing time, because publication would be a nice outcome, but it's not my sole goal. I only have the publishing thought when I get confused about status and what writing means to me. Work descends on me all the time. It's a fact. It's also job security. Completion is a myth from an earlier part of my life, and I can live with that ambiguity (God bless you, publishing industry, for teaching me about ambiguity.)
Many of the things I worry about are going to be there and there's no real reason to worry about them. What if I spin them? Behold, Pollyanna time! Here is a different way of looking at something.
Look, I've done this many cool things at work this year. Think of what will happen when we do
You know, your health problems aren't major, and you manage risk with diet and exercise. You see your doctor. You do the best you can.
You know that the new book is better, and you care about your writing improving. You were going to write anyway, and you're growing in your art. The point is to write, not to be published.
If you're tired, you can go out to eat in a healthy way. You also know that once you get into the groove, you enjoy cooking.
Look at what I did, right there. I re-framed all that negativity into positivity. I will grant you, this is not possible all the time. If Jay Lake wants to be down about dying of cancer, he doesn't deserve to be bright-sided. But with the minutia, I can do better, because all I'm doing is making my life harder to live if I don't. It's okay to be sad. But I'm sure I have very little to be sad, stressed, or worried about in reality.
And of course, now that I've laid this groundwork, let's talk about how this applies to one of the biggest areas of rejection in my life, my writing.